Fun With Guns And The Attack Of The Wild Boar

Yesterday I found myself in California’s little slice of Texas, also known as Bakersfield. I’ve often noted that rural Texas is where I’ve found the nicest people in the country (though I’ve not traveled so extensively to exclude other places definitively) and I find the same in rural Bakersfield. It wasn’t just myself but perhaps 100 others along with my sweetcakes of a daughter, Abby, all gathered for the 5th annual Mick Asbury ALS Shootout. This would be Abby’s first year attending and not likely her last.

Abby and I got up at 3:30am to get ready and left at 4:30am on the 2.5 hour trek up north. Scratch that… we got up at 3:30am with the *intention* of leaving at 4:30am. Turns out our pal Chris Johnson who was going to hitch a ride with us decided he needed a bit more sleep and that his alarm clock should go off at 3:30pm rather than “a.m.”. No worries though, I was going early to help setup but we arrived in time to get some breakfast, mingle and head up to our starting station with time to spare. I’ve gotta bust your chops CJ… it’s in my DNA. Truthfully, I was nervous about having 3 kids in my group without an additional adult to keep things moving while avoiding blown-off toes. Thanks for cruising!

Abby has shot before but only a couple of times and each with only a few rounds. This was going to be 17 stations and a total of 100 rounds with a fairly heavy .20 gauge which she had a hard time keeping in proper position. The bruising on her arm and shoulder tell enough of the tale but eventually she had to give in and start skipping stations. She hung in like a trooper and even with a few tears decided to hang with us rather than head back to the main gathering area. She says she’ll be back but will work on her upper body strength to make sure she’s ready next year.

My biggest fear in the early part of the day was seeing one of the kids discharge their weapon unexpectedly. We wanted to let them take responsibility and do things on their own but still kept a watchful eye. A few gentle reminders from CJ to “keep your finger off the trigger until you’re ready to shoot” and they were doing just fine. Well, the 14 year old, Gavin, was more seasoned than me and did not need any help. Heck, he had to fix my gun twice as I jammed the 2nd round when loading. Personally, I think it was due to a design flaw in the gun. But really, they should have assigned someone to watch *me* as I watched the kids. 🙂

Moving right along, the shoot was good; The folks in front of and behind us were awesome as usual. I got 30 out of 100 which is crappy but better than last year and not so bad for someone who only ever shoots at this event. The 14 year old got 56 of 100. I would have beat him up but he’s bigger and stronger than me and some might have viewed that as being a sore loser. If you want to know what pride tastes like, drop me a note and I’ll send you a description. I forget what CJ got but I know he beat me pretty handily. I think the only one I beat in our group was Abby and that’s likely because she didn’t finish all of the stations.

Once we were done shooting we made our way to the main gathering area for some awesome food and (finally!) some beer. Next up was the raffle. We bought $100 in tickets and I thought for sure I’d buck the two-year trend of going home empty-handed. After all, I had my good luck charm of a daughter with me. Sadly, my Schleprock genes proved too powerful. Darin, Tyson and crew get some of the best raffle items for a group like us. They had 8 or 10 guns, lots of knives from Cold Steel (always generous donors to the cause!) and so many other items. They had a new one prize raffle this year too which was only for the 15 and under kids and didn’t cost them anything to participate. They called up the kids, had them each pick a card, tear it in half and then they’d pick a half from a bucket. The winner got a neat .22 rifle. Really a sweet deal and so much fun for the kids. Great idea Asbury clan!

Gavin’s mom (Joey) was there too, having managed to get two kegs of Manrock beer donated along the way. She also poured beer for the crowd. Alex and Ronelle were up late and up early to provide their delicious breakfast burritos and they donated several items from their 2 Hot Headz food company. Kari (Darin’s girlfriend) seemed to be all over the place, helping wherever help was needed. I shan’t forget too that she being the always-prepared mother, had an Advil handy for Abby to help dull the pain in her shoulder and reduce the swelling (thanks Kari!).  So many other people donated time and other items but since I was late (yeah, CJ, that’s aimed at you) I didn’t get to track it all. Thanks all for making it a great day!

I’ll be curious how the Shootout organizers made out this year. If I understand things correctly they’ve been able to donate $77K from the previous 4 events to help locals afflicted with ALS. This is about helping individuals make their lives more bearable when little other help is available in the waning stages of the disease.

Oh yeah, that Wild Boar thing… that was link bait to a certain degree. At some point I noticed my ring finger was bleeding rather steadily and I’m thinking that when I reached into a box of ammo for some shells I cut myself on the container without realizing it. Being out on a shotgun range we had to come up with a better story than that so Me, Chris and Abby began spinning a tale of encountering a mad wild boar on the trail and me having wrestled it down and “hog-tying” it, must have caught my finger on its tusk. If you ever hear that bullshit story, don’t believe it. In truth, it was a ricocheted pellet from one of the guns that I saved from hitting a baby in a stroller by throwing myself in front of it at the last minute. Harrowing event that I don’t really like to talk about much.