Dads / Kids Camping Weekend 2012 Notes
Hello fellow dirtbags,
Every Dads/kids weekend has its challenges and upsides. This year the flies and ants were ridiculous but I also count the lack of police hassle (Thanks for preempting, Marc!) and insanely great weather as formidable upsides versus the challenges.
Since this is my newsletter I’m going to abuse my power a bit to talk about a couple of things that were amazing for me personally before I get to the general stuff about you idiots that I need to write down so I don’t forget.
As you know, in addition to my children I had two of my nieces and my father along this time. First, the girls. As one of the architects of the weekend in general I can get caught up doing things and the girls had a couple of choices: They could have, A) taken advantage of my busyness and acted like normal, out of control teenagers or, B) they could have helped, checked in every time I asked them to and generally made my life easier. They chose option B. I couldn’t be more proud. And a huge shout-out to Emilee (sp?) Weatherwax for being apart of that group and keeping things on an even keel; I should probably setup your tent next year as a thank you.
My Dad had a great time too and I have several of you to thank for helping make that happen. Let’s face it, he’s 200 years old now and his bones may not agree to sleep on the ground in the future so this was special for me. The fact that so many of you noticed that he apparently got a magnet too close to his compass during a walkabout was heartening. You’re still dirtbags but that was pretty F’in cool. Thx.
Now let’s get down to business because I have a lot of shit to get off my chest about this weekend and none of it is good.
First of all, I was way late this year due to school commitments for the boy’s class. Nothing pisses me off more than seeing Dave Sander have his camp setup before me. Then again, Mino got double-screwed so I take some solace in that.
Let’s see if I can recall something about each of you from the weekend. As is typical, if I leave you out it means you didn’t bring me any beer but you’d be justified in asking for your $100 back. I’ll see you in court.
Dean Ellis: We found that we’re both doing some work for companies in Ireland. Of course, I get to do it from the States but that was still pretty cool. Was a little bummed that your nieces couldn’t make it this year but Jenna (as usual) more than made up for the absence. You realize I don’t get my federal matching funds when they are absent, right?
Scully: I love you dude, I really do. But keeping me up until 4:30am is not even cool. It’s also not cool to turn in early. Find a sweet spot or bring your guitar. Thankfully you brought Logan so that acted as a bit of an offset. Next year it’s music and new testament and down by 2am, cool?
Dave Sander: Bradley and Amanda are so pliable and (at least to the rest of us) don’t have a complaint to be lodged. They’re really great kids… they must have a decent Mom. Really appreciate you running so many kids on the skis. And, I’ll let my man-love show here… It’s really great for me to see you. Don’t ever arrive and setup camp before me.
Steve Sanders: Lord, I realize that everyone has their cross to bear but this seems too burdensome. If it weren’t for your awesome twins I would have thrown you out Saturday morning. I do appreciate you looking out for my old man but you’re still a pussy for camping in an RV. Get with the program, buy a tent and camp furreal next time. I’ll loan you the money if you’re a bit short. And: Chaffing… A&D. ’nuff said, pussy.
Counselor Dion: Riley made strides this year! But stop camping in that back spot… no one cares about the noise (if they did me and Scully wouldn’t be invited). Riley and Connor were awesome together. I can’t wait to see what next year holds for those two. I’m also convinced that your note from last year made it possible for us to avoid the big hassle factors with the cops.
Phil Crouse: The human jellyfish… wherever the tide takes you. You’re still a girl for not coming up on Friday but really, with the flies, you ended up being the lucky one. We’ll never know if your tri-tip was overcooked or if you’re mad that you didn’t get enough ants in your breakfast burrito. Would you please bitch about *something*, just once?
Captain Nelson: I realize that Connor almost drowned (whatever). Wasn’t it cool to see him spread the wings a bit? In two years the weekend will be more about you but for now you’re fooked. Still worth it though brother… I hope you keep coming back. I’ll leave a half-opened bag of marshmellows in your tent next year just to make you feel proper.
Ely(s): Part of me wants to torch you for coming up on Saturday but you did handle A/V stuff and brought your boys so I’m gonna lean towards counting my blessings. Jonathan: It sickens me that you’re old enough to right the ski on your own *legally* (a’hem). You’re supposed to be a kid trying to master his 12’s times tables. Stephen: Aren’t you glad you decided to come up? There’s nothing like hanging with a bunch of over 40 idiots, huh? We’ll put on an even lamer show next year… you should join us!
Pop (Hugh to the rest of you): It was great having you back again. Next year I’m going to coax Infuhr to get his boat going in time so you can get out on the water. I think there’s wheelchair access at the docks. Can you imagine how nice it would have been if we had those new easy tents back when you were taking us camping? I sure don’t miss those damn old aluminum poles.
Alex: The man with the spices. Where can we buy some? You better get your illegal ass out for the whole weekend next year. And don’t bring that stupid tent trailer… that’d put you one step away from being as lame as Sanders.
TQ, I’m gonna tread lightly here because I’ve really come to depend on the wood you provide. I was glad you were able to at least make the day trip. Honestly, I mostly miss you doing all the dishes after Sunday breakfast and taking my kids out on the ski so I can sloth around on shore. Maybe next year.
Tyson: Where’s my AR? It’s always good to see you, even if just for the day but one of these years we’ll get you out for the whole weekend. I know you get nervous at night but I know a guy who works in the prison system and I’ll have him protect you. Pinky promise.
Tim Infuhr: The ghost. You take the “leave no traces” bit of camping to a new level. If you’re going to workout so much do us a favor and leave your damn shirt on. I almost got kicked out of the group for standing next to you with no shirt on because everyone thought I was a woman. Knock it off or start smoking.
Mino: The jetski mechanic who couldn’t get his boat running but fixed both of Darin’s. You gotta see the irony in that. That Saturday afternoon chicken was badass. I hope the rest of the dirtbags don’t start thinking we’re going to provide Saturday lunch going forward. Michael and Hannah were great as usual but I did feel really bad that the sun treated your girl so badly.:( Next year I’ll reserve a slightly cooler day with Ma Nature.
Steve Weatherwax: How on earth do you keep those skis running so reliably? Especially given all the knuckleheads running around on them all day? I think everyone is having so much fun riding your gear that we don’t always remember to tell you how thankful we are that you bring them (and yourself of course). How do you end up with such mellow dogs?
Kent: This year was pretty ridiculous with your cooking gear. Next year I’ll bring more so we don’t all hover over yours the entire time. I really dug on your tent setup with the two facing each other and one carpet between the two. Thanks for doing the cooking (and the cleaning! Fuck, we suck. Where’s TQ?). Next year you’re going to have to find a way to stay Sunday night. Shhhh. Don’t tell the other dirtbags or it’ll ruin the whole gig. Emily and Katie were (as always, as in, every time) really awesome. They really make the weekend for my kids and I’m sure the others as well. Thanks kids!
Katie: This is the first time I’ve included a “kid” (hah!) in the list but it is well warranted. Too many great things to say about what you add to the experience for everyone. I hope you’re the first non-dad to bring kids to the trip. You’re a staple for the group and we all hope you keep coming back for as long as the group exists. Kent, feed me her email and I’ll add her to the list directly… if it’s cool with you. You’re officially a “Dad” in our book.
Darin: The man with the plan, the founder. I think I can speak for the whole group in saying we really appreciate how much work you put into making this all happen. We missed Zac but Matthew was killer as usual (at least for Ben and me. Screw those other guys!). Sunday night was key, eh? Make sure you don’t tell anyone. Well, I already told Kent but that’s cool, right? We’ll bring a separate pony keg just for the three of us that we can tap after all those other turds leave. We may need to fake packing up just so they don’t suspect anything. Really dude, you and Kent put on a great time and we all appreciate it.
To those who couldn’t make it this year: You did get to avoid the brutal flies this year but weather and fellowship were unbelievable. I hope you can make it next year to add to the mayhem.
The price increase this year was a bit of a test. I think for the first time we were able to cover the gas/oil completely. If everyone had showed up who expressed interest we would have gone over so I’m going to play with numbers next year to get closer. $50 was a not enough but $100 may be a bit high, depending on how many skis we have and how many dads show up. Stay tuned for my magical, Enron-style accounting report.
Finally, I’d like to personally thank all of the dads and the kids who came along for the ride. Every year I sit back for a few moments, several times per day during the weekend just to soak in the joy and sense of discovery the kids demonstrate while we’re all together. I’m so thankful that we have such a tight group. I think it’s rare to have so many personalities in such close quarters without any measurable conflict. You all may be dirtbags but I’m thankful to be associated with all of you (except for Sanders, we gotta keep that guy down).
Til next year!
-tom